Jelly Bean Kelley - My Uncle

I cut and copied this from my other journal. Its just too fun. REALLY


Medieval sword, mallet, armor no match for ye olde Taser

There are just no words to describe how proud I am of this. This man is my uncle. He lives with my two aunts in my grandmother's house. Now typically I think that my father is the fruit cake nut ball of this family. JESUS he thinks he worked for NASA....but for one shineing moment in time this definitly has to take the cake.


AUGUST 5--Meet Robert McClain. The Michigan man, 42, was arrested last week after he attempted to literally go medieval on cops. According to the below Royal Oak Police Department report, officers were dispatched to McClain's home after a motorist called 911 to report that McClain had fled the scene of an auto accident. When they arrived at his crib, McClain allegedly tried to strike a cop with a four-foot sword. After missing, McClain retreated to his basement, where he donned a chainmail armored vest and leather gauntlets to protect his arms. He also added a giant wooden mallet to his arsenal and beckoned officers to come downstairs and get him. "I'm gonna crush your fucking skulls," McClain warned. Then, in a nice rhetorical flourish (for a lunatic, at least), he added, "I have a thousand years of power." That omnipotence, however, was no match for a police Taser, which felled McClain. He was then carted off and charged with felony assault and a misdemeanor count for failing to remain at an accident scene.


People wonder why I don't really talk to anyone on that side of the family but my cousin Becca but this is just to good to be true. The best, I mean the really best part is that this reached all over the United States. What are the chances that no one will ever know this. I mean in general I don't seem to have really good luck but you know someday I will go for a really great job interview and someone will remember this. I will be sitting in front of a group of my peers and they will say "McClain.......hmmmmm.........isn't that the name of that man who dressed up like a character from Lord of the Ring and swung a sword at the cops?" Then of course they will decide we are related because lets just face it I am just a little weird too and I will not get the job or whatever. The whole thing is really just to fantastic to believe. Scott just can't understand why I find this so funny. I guess you would really have to be part of my family.........at least from my outcast position to understand.

There is another funny acount here: http://bunnyspatial.com/?p=149#comments